In a ground-breaking study recently featured in the New York Times, psychologist Arthur Aron succeeded in making two strangers fall in love simply by having them ask each other a series of 36 questions.
The journalist writing the piece for the New York Times was so intrigued by the study and having gone through a recent breakup asked a man she was merely acquainted with (they had never hung out one on one) if he was willing to meet at a bar and go through these questions with her as an experiment.
"I wondered what would come of our interaction. If nothing else, I thought it would make a good story. But I see now that the story isn’t about us; it’s about what it means to bother to know someone, which is really a story about what it means to be known.
But despite all this, I’ve begun to think love is a more pliable thing than we make it out to be. Arthur Aron’s study taught me that it’s possible — simple, even — to generate trust and intimacy, the feelings love needs to thrive.
Additionally, asking the right questions will potentially save you a lot of heart-ache if asked early in the relationship if "red flags" pop up. I’ve heard way too many stories of long-term relationships or marriages breaking up because important things never got discussed in the early stages and caused huge issues later on.
These are questions that go beyond small talk and simply making conversation like you will find in most "questions" books. You will NOT find questions like "if you… Read more…